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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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Next, I hit up the Westfries Museum. I’m all about that history, man. I walk in, and it’s like stepping back in time. There’s this painting of a shipwreck, and I’m like, “Wow, that’s deep.” But then, I overhear this couple arguing about art. Like, chill out, people! It’s just paint on a canvas. I’m trying to vibe, not listen to your drama.

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